And, then the marriage…

From being a self-conscious, meek girl she has finally learnt to express herself. She wears what she wants, drinks what she wants, listens to the desi numbers in public without being embarrassed and doesn’t try to explain herself after tearing up in the movie theatre.

She was finally living her life. There was no one to judge her. No one to tell her that she should get dressed on a particular evening. She wore a pretty dress to the shadiest of the bar and the shabbiest of her shirts to a five-star hotel; she did whatever she felt like.

But, of course, this was not to last.

As she turned 25, her mother thought that it was the perfect age for her to get married. She needed to have kids before it was too late (30, in her mother’s opinion).

But, was she ready? No one asked her.

She had started enjoying her freedom; she did not want to give it up. But, she could not tell her mother that she enjoyed “hooking-up”. Her mother could not even believe that she could have sex before marriage, having sex casually was not in her books.

Thus began the search for the “perfect” groom. Tall, handsome, in a good profession and money-d – these were the criteria her mom was looking for. Emotional or sexual compatibility- what’s that?

“Arey, once you get married, the rest will fall into place. Everyone has to adjust a little,” she used to tell the girl. This was like a death sentence to her ears, not a joyous union. But, instead of protesting, she went with the flow.

So, on her off days she would go and meet her prospective matches – and turn them down. Oh, she actually liked a guy, but the pace with which the whole relation was progressing was too much for her. So, she said no.

And then, one by one her mother’s criteria dropped. “Oh it’s okay, he is tall enough. Just don’t wear heels maybe. Arey, what’s the problem? He is okay looking, but he earns 20 lakhs,” and the convincing went on and on.

This pushed her to the edge. She had a demanding job, a self-imposed healthy schedule and a beauty regimen to follow. In between, listening to her mom was just too much for her.

This led her to do something that she had never imagined herself doing……


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